by Sydney Hill
Step One: Do the awkward stare-intently-at-the-dog-and-then-make-eye-contact-with-owner thing.
Step Two: Smile awkwardly at the owner and wait for them to give the ‘you can pet my dog’ smile.
Step Three: Walk towards dog and officially ask owner if you can pet their dog.
Step Four: Immediately start petting dog and using a baby voice to tell the dog how good he is.
Step Five: Cradle the dog and contemplate your life if that dog was yours.
Step Six: Take at least 6 snapchats with the dog.
Step Seven: Continue petting the dog and ignore all cues from the owner that they want you to leave now.
Step Eight: Remember that you have class in 2 minutes, contemplate stealing the dog, and finally loosen your grip.
Step Nine: Sit in class covered in dog hair and slobber and reminisce on just how awesome that experience was.
Step Ten: Instagram a picture of the stranger’s dog with the caption “Stole a dog today.”